Sometimes I’m all about being a sex toy connoisseur.

I spend time browsing the latest releases in high sex toy culture, acquiring and reviewing the crème de la crème, and considering with extreme shrewdness whether these products are worth the exorbitant price tags that they often attribute to themselves.

Just because a company has given a toy a certain price tag, after all, doesn’t mean it cost them anywhere near as much, nor does it mean that it is actually worth the price it’s been given.

But then other times I just want to be an everyday sex toy geek. I eye up tacky vibrating duckies with the sole purpose of wanting to display it, squee at adorable emoji shaped items, and buy cheap vibrators purely because all I want is a cheap vibrator. Usually that means I think it’s cute or I think it has promise. Very rarely it means both.

This, my friends, is one of those very rare times, and I’m quite happy to be able to report that to you.

The Collection Sweet Cream Classic Slimline Vibrator by Blush Novelties

£19.

This little gem of a vibrator only costs £19 and it’s £19 well spent.

If I’m being honest I’d probably buy this toy for £19 even if I didn’t want to use it, purely because it’s adorable design. £19 is less then I’d spend on some t-shirts or leggings. It’s also cheaper then a meal at Yo! Sushi that I had recently. Outside of those Blue Tuesdays that place will rob you blind without you even noticing it, but I digress.

What gives this toy such appeal to me? Well, if you’ve looked at the photos of this product then you can probably guess.

Kawaii ice creams, lollipops, and swirls decorate the entire shaft of this classic slim vibe. One of them is made of minty strawberries and has an adorable kitty face. A similarly feline lollipop shares space with it, whereas one that I see as a bubblegum offering flaunts its lashes, happily looking to the potential user like “Yes, we know we’re delicious, now turn us on and find out just how true this is.”

The biggest downside to this toy follows from this point – before you can turn this toy on you will need batteries, which you have to provide yourself. *Deep and heavy sobbing* Still, I suppose no toy is perfect.

My recommendation for this toy would be to use rechargeable AAs (of which it will require 2) but I understand that sometimes convenience trumps being eco-aware. But what a wonderful thing to have such convenience. Every time I use a battery-powered sex toy I’m reminded how nice it is. If the charge runs out I don’t have to plug it in, wait for it to charge, and search frantically for a replacement vibe of similar power and vibration style while my vulva loses its vrum. Instead I just open my side drawer, pop in some new batteries, and we’re good to go. This is even better when travelling – where carrying multiple vibes wouldn’t work so well but carrying 2xAAs is much more viable.

The Collection Sweet Cream Classic Slimline Vibrator by Blush Novelties also offers a certain degree of diversity too.

This toy follows the classic vibe style and is, as it suggests, slim in diameter. How slim? Well, if I were still using dilators I wouldn’t be using it as my first challenge but I might build up to it as my 4th dilator and feel like it would be excellently suited for the role.

That is, to say it has a total length of 7 inches, a 5.5 insertible inch, and a very nice 1 inch diameter.

This toy starts with a tapered tip and then comes out to a smooth and standard size for the rest of it and this is where the diversity comes in.

can use this toy internally but I can equally lay it on my labia and enjoy a total vulva vibration. I can also take its pinpoint and rub more directly on my clit, or move it in to position to stimulate someone’s nipples, perineum (externally), scrotum, or coronal ridge. I can place it on areas of intense pleasure on partners with amputations or those who have non-conventional areas of sexual sensitivity. I can also just place it on a sex toy display and admire how adorable it is. The choice is mine.

What I can’t do is use this toy anally or with a harness because it doesn’t have a flared base, but outside of that the world is my playground.

A single twizzle cap at the top of this lovely ABS plastic product controls the intensity of its continual vibrations and the shaft feels almost matte on the surface and lovably stroking when lubricated slightly.

The vibrations from this toy are impressive too, and that’s what really matters. This product make look cute and timid but it can frizzle and shiver its way to quite some depth. “Frizzle” is probably the best word for the vibrations present in this toy, and that comes with a certain degree of loud buzzing noise, which means this toy isn’t good for discretion, but it sure is good for making me gleefully clench to a satisfied climax for under twenty squid (cockney slang for ‘quid’ or a GBP, don’t cha know).

So, yeah, I kind of have to laugh at the ‘whisper quiet’ description of this toy but I can appreciate the very loud noises that it produces in me.

This product is also splashproof (not submersible but good to clean in a rinse), phthalate-free, and lab certified to be completely body safe. I appreciate all of these additional elements of the Collection Sweet Cream Classic Slimline Vibrator by Blush Novelties and they come together to make a pretty impressive vibrator.

Count me a happy chappy.

Final Thoughts

Of course, impressive, doesn’t mean perfect and the shape, size, vibration type, and lack of waterproof and rechargeable features will irritate or downright off put some individuals but I personally find it impressive that this toy delivers so much for monetarily so little.

The Collection Sweet Cream Classic Slimline Vibrator by Blush Novelties is absolutely adorable and suitably designed to provide strong, satisfying orgasms from a variety of different scenarios. I like it as a clitoral vibrator but I appreciate that I can use it internally and love the fact that it could be used as a dilator.

I strongly recommend the Collection Sweet Cream Classic Slimline Vibrator by Blush Novelties for anyone who likes budget sex toy offerings and don’t feel like you’ll be missing out at all for the lower price tag of this toy.

Congratulations, Blush, you’ve made yet another awesome toy.

Recommend to:

  • People who like strong vibrations.
  • People who like ABS toys.
  • People looking for a vibrating dilator of 1 inch.

Do Not Recommend to:

  • People looking for a harness/anal-compatible toy.
  • People who want a lot of strength.
  • People who dislike hard/straight/battery-powered toys.