I wonder if my career’s advisor ever thought that, one day, my job would involve shoving a vibrator shaped like a hippo against my clit…
I mean, I hope they weren’t imagining that of a teenage girl but, you’ve got to admit, I’m certainly living the high life.
Really, though, there’s a certain amount of joy that comes from getting a sex toy arrive at your doorstep that defies convention in all manners.
Sure, we’ve had rabbits.
We’ve had ducks.
We’ve even had caterpillars.
But a hippo?
Adorable!
Hippos also have somewhat of a personal meaning for me.
Growing up I was a plus-sized lady in every regard and so when I thought of myself the vision of a hippo often sprung to mind. It wasn’t necessarily a kind one until I heard a rather silly meme song (Hippo Girl) as a young teen. The song was hardly flattering, nor necessarily serious, but it involved a tiny critter who loved a hippo lady in spite of what overs might find to be unlikeable traits. It blew my tiny teen mind and made me suddenly think that being a ‘hippo girl’ could actually not be such a bad thing after all. Add in Madagascar’s romance between a giraffe and a hippo and you can only imagine how happy I became over the years.
And then there’s this – a hippo sex toy. An animal that some consider to be the epitome of chunky undesirability suddenly transformed in to and adorable, playful icon of sex. Not relegated for its curves but actually celebrated for them, as the toy uses a hippo’s natural contours as the main design element of the product.
My potential to love this toy was large when it arrived. But did it live up to that potential? That’s what this review is all about.
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Rechargeable Waterproof 12-Function G-Spot Vibrator
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Rechargeable Waterproof 12-Function G-Spot Vibrator is a vibrator primed for G-Spot stimulation but capable of so much more.
You may know Satisfyer as the company that took the sex toy world by storm when they made affordable suction-based sex toys. And, for the longest time, these are the toys that have graced my site, but Satisfyer have since branched out considerably and vibrators are now one of the many other toy types that they offer.
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator is the first vibrator from Satisfyer that I have personally tried, so I was keen to see what they might deliver to the industry and the answer is a standard, but undeniably effective, offering that merges play with results.
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator’s biggest selling point undoubtedly has to be its design. With a head shaped like a hippo (or, to my mind, a cheery manatee) this toy creates a cure little double-chinned curve that bulges at its snout to offer up a semi-unique G-Spotting shape.
I say ‘semi-unique- because the way that this curve is composed is almost at an inverse angle to many other G-Spotting vibes. There’s a sort of divot to either side of the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator‘s snout and a sharp upward angling that you don’t often see executed to such an extreme degree.
It’s definitely reminiscent of some Fun Factory toys (especially the Patchy Paul) but with more prominence in the angling of its G-Spotting bulge.
This toy has a confident sort of appeal to its head curvature which then contrasts to a shaft that curves downwards instead of offering the conventional banana-like bend of most vibes of its ilk to generally make a toy that seems made for a subtly different experience.
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator is made from ABS plastic (the handle) and a wonderfully smooth matte silicone with both materials being non-porous, phthalate-free, and completely body safe. It’s waterproof, so you can clean it easily, and USB rechargeable. All of this is offered at a retail price below $50 which puts the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator in a competitive bracket when you do compare it to things such as the Patchy Paul.
A 3-button control system is placed nicely on the control panel of the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator and is easy to use. There’s a power button – which you press and hold to turn the toy on and off – and then two buttons which essentially act as a + and – to cycle through the toy’s 6 different intensities and 6 different rhythms.
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator’s vibrations range from a near-inert and very gentle jiggle to a very persistent deep hum which is lacking in rumble but well refined for internal stimulation.
As I said before, this toy isn’t just for internal use though and the resonant buzz of the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator is also effective at caressing the clitoris or hitting the perineum externally.
For this the snout works very well. It’s just about the right size and shape to essentially work as a mid-sized wand and create strong (but not overpowering) orgasms.
Internally, however, the vibrations and angle of this toy really come in to their own and the best word to describe the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator in this capacity is ‘persistent.’
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator‘s snout is rather firm, meaning that once it’s on the G-Spot it is on it and there’s no mistaking the potency and effectiveness of its nuzzling sensations.
Because this toy has a max ‘bulge’ section of 1.125 inches at the head it feels pretty easy to insert and sits comfortably inside the body without feeling uncomfortable or eliciting that semi-concerning “I need to pee” sensation. Yet its wonderful snout knows just how to make the G-Spot sing and leave you with a smile as wide and giddy as that of the hippo’s own adorable grin.
The shaft of this toy also widens to a nicely broad 1.75 inches, meaning if you want to feel a bit more chunk that is available to you.
That’s not to say that this toy is without flaws, however, and I have a few niggles with it.
The first would be the above mentioned chunk – in order to feel this toy’s fullness you do end up moving past a nice length for G-Spotting, which means you’re kind of missing out on one element to chase the other.
There are also three bumps near the very end of this toy’s shaft which are mostly redundant unless you do want to go deep and, even then, don’t offer much in terms of sensation.
This toy’s shaft is also rather bendy which will annoy people who like to push hard for pressure when angling their toys – it’s just not possible with the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator.
The silicone section of the handle ring is also very flexible, which I found to be distracting at times, though that might be a personal preference.
Speaking of personal preferences, if you like rumble in your toys then the Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator might disappoint. It’s vibrations are more smooth and penetrating rather than juddering and deep and that’s a difference that true rumble-lovers (like myself) will notice immediately.
Overall, however, I really can’t fault this toy much considering it meets what seem to be most of its key design and performance criteria. These criteria just might leave some people a bit disappointed, all things considered.
Final Thoughts
The Satisfyer Petting Hippo Vibrator might not be the most extraordinary G-Spotting toy out there but it is a very cute and reasonably effective offering which, if you’re like me, will be a near must-have just from aesthetics alone.
This toy knows how to firmly nudge strong orgasms out of its users, with a snout primed for play and vibrations that are well crafted for their intended purpose.
Sure, it’s not going to radically change the market, but it has offered something different and, for that, I applaud it.
Recommend to:
- Hippo fans.
- People who like strong G-Spot bulges.
- People who like non-conventional toys.
Do Not Recommend to:
- People who dislike strong bulges.
- People who prefer an upwards-curved shaft.
- People who prefer firm shafts.